Seeing the big picture

Everybody wants to know “how” to lose weight, but have they ever asked themselves “why?” If it’s because you want to look good for an upcoming wedding or holiday, then we have to look at the real issues surrounding the “why”.

Such an extrinsically motivated reason to lose weight says that you really want to feel more attractive, so you can gain feelings of love, acceptance, self-confidence and self-worth — and avoid pain in the form of perception of lonliness.

So, what somebody wants to achieve is irrelevant, it’s why they want to achieve it. Ultimately, it’s because everybody just wants to be loved! And if people can change their perceptions by not judging others and and love each other for who they truly are, then it wouldn’t matter what we look like.

Well, we can’t change everybody else’s perception, but you can change yours!

This is important as a parent to know, for example, because everything you say and do affects how your children will grow up. They don’t think about what and why they do things, they just repeat and copy everything you do. Your values and beliefs become their values and beliefs. And, if you’re always obsessing about losing weight, worried about what you look like, and what others think of you, then guess what? Your children will pick up on this and take on your same superficial obsessions.

So what is it you believe? Who is it that you ultimately want to become? What kind of role model do you want to be for your children and others? If we look at the big picture, who do we as a people, a community and a species want to become?

Do you have a life philosophy? If not, I suggest you get one. As with any goal, a life philosophy gives you direction, purpose and challenges you to grow, learn and move forward.

Here is my philosophy — take it or leave it:

1. Don’t believe everything you hear or read. Make your own decisions.
2. Life is about building solid relationships whether it be family, friends or personal.
3. Really get to know yourself. Look at your past — your family history and how you were brought up. Don’t judge, just realize that’s what it was, and if it was good, then great! If not, don’t let that define who you are, here and now. Accept it, learn from it and move on. Next, is the present. Who are you now? Do you harbor any ill feelings from the past still? Did you learn from them? Are you happy with where you are at? If not why? What is it that you truly want? This is your future and you can have anything you want, you just have to be CLEAR & SPECIFIC on what it is. By knowing your past, you can change your future.
4. In life comes opportunities and within every opportunity comes choices. And there are only two choices: fear and love! Fear comes in many forms. It can be anger, hatred, guilt, jealousy etc. Love is being the most genuine and caring person you can be to yourself and others based on trust and respect. Which one will YOU choose?

Believe in yourself! Do things because you want to, not because you have to or to please others.